greeting

I'm delighted that you came, thank you very much. It's great pleasure to have you here, and I'm very grateful to you for coming here for making this big effort, cause all I've got to do is just turn up sober. So I'm rather obligated to you for being here right now, guess I'll do whatever takes to keep you entertained.

I don't know, you come in, people come in here wanting stuff, I don't know what you want, I don't know what everyone want, I don't even have any idea what I want in fact. Cake! Yay, I think cake is what I want. Cause cake is the language of love, I haven't see any in this room. You know when people say "I love you. I love you!" which will get rather tedious and repetitive and you think, "Right, so where's the proof? How about make me a fucking cake? A chocolate Éclair!" Truth is, people don't need to eat anymore cakes in English speaking countries generally, even the poor. We're all over fed. Eating is purely regards as sort of recreational things now. So why fucking around with soup, or chicken, or any other stuff. Just... cake!

Thank you very much for coming out here;

I don't know, there's too much going on and not enough time to understand. It just fucking carries on. I can't cope anymore with... days. There're too many days. Day is stupid length. Sort of just long enough to get you regret before you've got go for sleep. It's like what a glorious morning when wake up, and by the lunch time you've already fucked up everyone you know. And when it's time to hit the bed yourself you think, I hate my life!

I’m very slow at the beginning, and I sort of take it easy in the middle, and usually wander it down towards the end. Because there's too much, in front of your face, around this part of the town.

I've always believed you have to have a good relationship with pleasure. People here seem to buying into this idea. Your approach seems to be to go, "I don't know what I want, but I know whatever I want it now."

Isn't it terrific here, probably the best place to be right now. Cause, you know it's critical time in human history, especially as of right now. I think we should all be praying. How about let's mute a minute of silence for... everything, cause apparently, it’s ever happening forever.

It's long time since I've been in hospitality, but I do remember this script I wrote for patrons that I hated on sight. So, what you do first is put up your very best middle class smile, then go up and say:

Listen, don't get sensitive, Okay. I don't want to insult you, your country, your history, your faith, your belief, your political hope of the future, your relationship between man and woman, or anything. Yeah?! The thing is though, I don’t want to of course, but that's very often what's end up happen, whenever a joke involved.

Thanks for being honest, cause lots people lie all the time, especially at greeting. You know, like when you meet somebody on street, you go "hello, how’re you?" they go "I'm fine, how’re you?" you say "I'm fine." And then you both go "Ok, see you!" Can't really be fucked by human communication most of the time.

The fact is that everybody is prejudice. I have often riddled with prejudice, I depend on my own prejudice to remind me who I am. I don't want fucking people coming up to me all the time, being as nice to me as they are to everybody else. Cause apparently, I know they’re lying. My problem most of the time, is that other people don't think exactly like I do, and that made my day so long! People being nice all the time to one another is a very bad idea. It means bad things would have to happen to them later at night, or they'll have to do some very bad things.

There’re so many things you can do here in Sydney. You didn't have to come out here to torture yourself at all. It's not like where I used to stay in Scotland, season like this you'd have incessant rain that can last 3 and half weeks. Any given Friday night you'll have 55 guys running around a bar fighting over an empty bag of crisps. And you know, back there, people style their hair with buttermilk, and they're proud of having a golden teeth in between the family. And of course, it all then transformed after 2000 thousand years of that, the city suddenly become a kind of mesh of Barcelona and Tokyo. Everybody wants to going out with someone called Aneka.