old

Scottishness alway reminds me amazing things from Scotland, it goes on, and on, and on. The list of things you depend upon every day life that you don’t even aware of, like, Televisions, Monkeys, Steaming Engines, Papaya, Lightening, Kung-fu, Pubic hair, Oh, it's endless.

The idea of cruise would just make you vomit all over yourself when you were younger. But when you got to certain age you suddenly going “Oh, yeah, travel without moving, I’m in. I can just be lying there like a starfish. Every hour a half somebody will come over and pour gravy all over me. What? 2 grand a weekend! That's gonna be great! Where do I sign?”

You know when mid-age comes, it's suddenly when you realised you are seriously uncool. That’s how the age functions. Everything is sort of same, year after year, for ages. It’s like you’re stand there talk to your friends going “Yeah, yeah, anyway, we did this, we did that…” You know while Madonna is there, reassuringly in the background going “like a virgin~” some of these, and then you turn around, suddenly it’s Eminem going “You better never let it go~” a totally different kind of poetry.

Once you over the age of 30, you end up watching these news programs, you know, the ABC, BBC, or whatever it is on there. Cause there's no any other TV going to make you that bored and angry at the same time. You go "Oh Trump! It's him again! I hate him, he comes out, every time, he comes out… he comes out... I hate... em... please make him go away."

Woman pick up things in a completely different way that alienating man considerably often. Cause woman would say things like "Oh, I knew she was depressed." "Why?" "She didn't finish her tea." "What..." Man need more evidence, "I knew he was bit off line, his head was on fire. Hahaha~"

All these systems that failed, the Westminster, the Expenses, the Catholic churches that dishonoured, the banks that collapsed... Well, banks didn't really collapse, cause the government came out and says, "Oh, we deal with all that." And then they went up to banks, they said "Oh~~ you guys! You're just like you were in college, yeah. Close the hospital." And now the media is falling apart after fake news and Internet.

I don't understand anything and I don't pretend to. I thought I understand human relationship, where I am and what's going on at the time. But look, I'm getting middle-aged, soon to be over-weight and will be confused most of the time. The world is changing too quick for me. Things that I remember and familiar with are no longer exist. I wish everything to go backwards... Not really though, just joking. But I don't know what's coming. For the young people out there, they will decide, they will decide what the future is going to be, it's not up to me. I've already checked. No one has asked me to any those meetings.

I've never be appealed by stimulants or drugs and so on. Young people do weeds that's why they speak the way they do. You know, it's a very inarticulate expression. I can’t stand them, they greeting one another with handshake for three quaters of an hour going "Hey, Yo, Man. What up, kick back on the chill, yeah, how's hanging? What's happening?" Whenever I see that I just want to say, "Fuck off!! Use some words, will you?"

I wish everyone is honest, but obviously not, loads of adult conversations are just people been pointlessly polite. All those matured boardroom meetings are just a bunch of fucking lies. People pretend being polite to one another, turning up and say "Oh, I'm so sorry, so sorry! I'm late. Em... It was the traffic, terrible, awful, I had to perform stunt across the bridge using only the first gear. It's very very difficult, very very sorry."

If you're at 20s, your mindset of pleasure is very strange though, because you do sort of measure what a good time you had by how much you've messed yourself up, right? At 20s, you go out, you can do anything, drink battery ACID all night, then wake up and have a fight, your hangover aren't so bad then. They're quite direct, they come and go, kind of like bailiffs. And they just say “You're very very stupid last night," POO!! "Get up! Get into the kitchen!" "Oh~~~ Sorry... What have I done..." Bang [kicking]!! "Shut up! Get into the kitchen!" Bang [kicking]!! "Oh~~~ What am I allowed to do today?" Bang [kicking]!! "Cry, mainly."

If you're like me, had been on this planet for a while, you may sometimes found yourself cannot stand younger people, healthy people. Healthy, young, attractive people doing whatever they want, bending down and getting up in the same afternoon. It's revolting. Because I remember that, had being live like that considering all old people are terrible dull. But I was wrong. If you look at young people on the street, greeting, doing those handshakes that take 3 quarters of an hour, with their amazingly redundant language going, "Yeah, Yo, Dull, kicking back with the chill, Rad, what up..." You think, "What the fuck are you talking about? Why can't you just say a Hello!?

Look you have to remember what's good about young being at 30s. Yes, you might be poor, yes, it maybe difficult, it is. It's hard to get a job, hard to get a house, all is hard. But you have to remember what you have got, youth. People get stupid as they getting old, before they got properly stupid, clearly old, even before that they've already half-witted. Because the value changes, the fact is that you get anxious, as you're getting close to death.

The fact is that your youth vanishes on you. It surprises people all the time. That's why people say it seems like yesterday. It doe seems like yesterday to me, as I was out drinking tequila with my friends. I mean tequila! That's not even a drink, it's just a way to get police around without using a phone. Now, I'm on the phone to the same friend and asking them for recipes, going "How do you make breadcrumbs," but back of my head going, "Jesus! What's happening to me? Please don't let me die at a Bunnings Warehouse. Don't turn me into one of those grumpy codgers begins every single fucking conversation with the words "I'm not a racist but..."

These are the fashions that comes and go, but they put pressures on you to stay involved with what's happening, what's now, what's relevant, what's hip. I sometime felt you're not even allowed to be old anymore. That's the truth, look at the Media, everything is all about sex. Sexy gorgeous, sexy outfits, sexy dentures, sexy walking frames... Even 85 means nothing, you can get sexy makeups and yoga pants, of course it's gonna work, come on, let's go baby.

Things change, things got taken away. You get taught what you have to do, stuff you didn't plan on doing, like you have to go and see doctors, specialist. That happens. This is why older people often described as boring. Cause they always talk about things like that. If you ask them, "What did you do today?” They go, "Em... I went to the doctor. He said he have to take it out. I was gonna keep it but he wouldn't even give me a break ends." "Yeah. I know, dentist advises." "I have to get my front scraped". All that kind of stuff.

When you get mature, what's odd is that things get taken away from you are normally things you don't expect. People talk about it all day, show you faded photos of grandmother standing in front old house, smiling fondly, with children and dogs, and weed field and so on. They probably fucked up their mind, had no clue where they’re, that's why they look so surreal.

When you reach certain age, you'll somehow agree that certainly you deserve respect from younger people. But they don't even aware you're there, let along decide whether they should respect you or not, cause they are too fucking busy with machines, gadgets, internet, and so on.