young

It is generally agreed that the generational gap is irreconcilable, cause young people out there are scared, worried about getting job and house and everything, resentful of all sorts towards older generations, not just think them as middle-aged codgers, but also begrudge them. Cause nowadays, if you're young, there’s no money, no jobs, the planet only has about 8 weeks left.

Story is that I did not want a dog! Cause I remember passing these guys in Parks around where I used live in Scotland. You know, these guys standing there in their Barbra jackets with some huge animal on a lead, taking shit in the weeds... They would look at you with this expression on their face as if to say “Oh... What can you do? Hey?” Well, let me tall you what you can do. You can not look around for excuses for giving up on your dreams, you fucking loser. That’s what you could do!! I used to think that every time, I didn’t say it. But now I don’t even think about it, I just say, “Morning Bob.” while I'm holding my own fucking dog.

The idea of cruise would just make you vomit all over yourself when you were younger. But when you got to certain age you suddenly going “Oh, yeah, travel without moving, I’m in. I can just be lying there like a starfish. Every hour a half somebody will come over and pour gravy all over me. What? 2 grand a weekend! That's gonna be great! Where do I sign?”

If you're like me, had been on this planet for a while, you may sometimes found yourself cannot stand younger people, healthy people. Healthy, young, attractive people doing whatever they want, bending down and getting up in the same afternoon. It's revolting. Because I remember that, had being live like that considering all old people are terrible dull. But I was wrong. If you look at young people on the street, greeting, doing those handshakes that take 3 quarters of an hour, with their amazingly redundant language going, "Yeah, Yo, Dull, kicking back with the chill, Rad, what up..." You think, "What the fuck are you talking about? Why can't you just say a Hello!?

Look you have to remember what's good about young being at 30s. Yes, you might be poor, yes, it maybe difficult, it is. It's hard to get a job, hard to get a house, all is hard. But you have to remember what you have got, youth. People get stupid as they getting old, before they got properly stupid, clearly old, even before that they've already half-witted. Because the value changes, the fact is that you get anxious, as you're getting close to death.

Nowadays these pop-stars pumped out of television by those production machine. Some of them are fine but some of them have no talent. You know some of them have their body parts more famous than them. You know people get their ass flew in different jets to play gig. And you'd wonder who the fuck are these people? They’re are not even people, they’re just things occupy thongs.

Of course it's difficult for people to relate to one another. I mean you have to find somebody first of all. And I'm worried about younger generations, not just because they losing skills all the time, cause that's OK, you don't have to worry, you don't have to write, speak, or spell anything properly anymore, you can just strangle your mobile phone or lick your iPad, it'll do everything for you. But what I concerned is that there’re certain key skills you need, that had been lost like dancing.

So the young man and young women realise eventually that you don't die young. It’s a huge lie. And of course young man knows he’s not dead, cause he's with a young woman now. And they rented a flat, and she’s talking about curtains. And that is the time he really really wants to be dead. Cause the young woman has been talking about curtains for more than half an hour. And looks like she means to go on. She said, "What do you think? Should we get that purple ones with really subtle blend to the pink tonality towards the end; Or should we get that one looks like a tree, but feels it's at night when you're passing by in a car. Which one do you think we should get? What you really feel, I can't make the decision by myself. What you really truly feel?" And what you really truly feel is that "I can not begin to describe how much I DON’T CARE! I didn't know we had windows, until you brought all the shit up, OK. Stop saying wallpapers, furnitures, floors, it's Bourgeoisie. Just eat the chicken from my hat, come on!"

So there's lots of pressure. Lot of pressure on the young man to say something snappy, seductive, and charming to a young woman in the dance hall, or disco, or whatever they called these days. You know those places, where you walk in, the music can bleed your ear in just about three seconds.

Sometimes I see young people sneak into our adults groups like this. And I must say, I... I... I don't like them. Even though I’m supposed to be sort of young but I'm mentally old. I don't like young people, cause they're itchy, and they running around too quickly. I just don't trust anything moves that fast. And I don't really understand their culture either, because young people go to these music festivals, with these 'Buff... Buff... Buff...". Apparently that sound to me just felt like a lot of people were putting up shelves. And they go there, they dance for 8 or 10 days without speaking nor sweating, and drinks five times of their own body weight, and then go home alone, because they’re too fucked to do anything else.

There's a lot of pressure on you to find the right person. Cause we were told if you don't get the right person your life is fucked, the whole thing would be fucked, most of you did, which is rubbish. There's billions of you out there. We're all the fucking same. Isn't it? If it’s not him it’s her. Or if it’s not her, it’ll be them. Look, there're millions of people for everybody, absolutely more than enough.

These are the fashions that comes and go, but they put pressures on you to stay involved with what's happening, what's now, what's relevant, what's hip. I sometime felt you're not even allowed to be old anymore. That's the truth, look at the Media, everything is all about sex. Sexy gorgeous, sexy outfits, sexy dentures, sexy walking frames... Even 85 means nothing, you can get sexy makeups and yoga pants, of course it's gonna work, come on, let's go baby.

You've got to remember at 25, you've got fucking everything. Yah!? You're young, you're beautiful, you're stupid. What more do you want? That's as good as you gets. You wake up in the morning, you can do whatever you want. You look at your breakfast you go, “I’ll just eat this and walk around, and talking shit all day long, then I'll find somebody to go to bed with him." And you do, even though it was just a Wednesday.

Young people don't really think about death at all, cause they've got the intelligence of a raspberry jam. But this thing, the death, as if a metaphor will always make you do things.

Young people out there don't know how to be alone anymore. Cause when they're alone, they mess around a computer. The other day, I said to my nephew, “What you doing Saturday night?" he went "Oh, I'm downloading a picture of a squid." "Why?!" "Well, I didn't have one before.” And when young people talking to you, they mess around a phone. "What is this?" "Oh, it's just an app." "OK, what does it do?" "It measures the distance between me and sadness." "What is wrong with you?" "Here's different one, I'm doing different one now." "What does that one do then?" "Oh, it can tell me the tipping point of your patience."